The Dirty Pair (Explicit Content)

Discussion in 'Traveler's Tales' started by ARCHIVED-Mythra-Flux, Aug 14, 2009.

  1. ARCHIVED-Mythra-Flux Guest

    Chapter#1 Hard Times
    ***
    On a late spring night in Windstalker Village, a strange foul odor could be smelt coming from a house at the end of the tiny settlement. Citizens held their noses in disgust and walked a little faster as they passed the house.

    The inside of the house was sparingly furnished. A run down old bed, table, and stove made up most of it. The place was in desperate need of a woman’s touch and in more ways than one, because although the house had no furniture, it did have many erotic books strewn on the floor, with titles like: Dark Elf Troubles and The Adventures of Lisa Loose.

    Standing over the stove was Sress, a young bearded man with no eyebrows. The smell was coming from a kettle he had boiling on the stove. He had been standing close to it long enough to get use to the terrible smell.

    Sress was the poorest man in the village, a failure at every businesses venture he had tried, and he had tried most of them.

    He stared out doing what most of the villagers did, fish in the pong the village was build near. He found quickly that fishing was a game of patients, a trait that he was known not to have. Sress never caught much and what he did catch didn’t sell well.

    Hunting the local animals for pelts was also something he tired to get into. The ghost of Holly Windstalker put an end to that enterprise quickly. He was about to kill a deer with his claymore, when it suddenly started floating away from him. He never found it.

    Since then he had tried everything from smithing to tailoring, he even sold fire wood from fallen trees in the woods. Nothing worked. Now he was alone in the house his father had left him, making a stew out of whatever he had left that was edible.

    After letting the stew boil for a few hours, he was convinced it was safe to eat. He dipped a wooden spoon into the bubbling gray mass and scooped a little up. He took a bite from the spoon and paused.

    Outside crickets chirped and an owl hooted as the young man stood holding the spoon in mid air, frozen solid.

    “I need a drink,” He said.

    ***
    The village tavern operated out of a old mill next to the pond, its water wheel still worked and could be see all the way from the farmlands in the south. Usually the tavern was full in the evening, but tonight only the bartender, a lonely bard, an old man, and Bobby McQuibble were there.

    Sress sauntered in, and ordered a mug of beer for himself. Booby motioned for him to join him at his table near the back of the room.

    “You know a man in your poison should be saving his coin, no matter how petty it might be.” Bobby said.

    Sress lifted up his mug. “This represents the last of my petty coin.”

    The bard played a slow sorrowful tune on a mandolin. The music filled the tavern and left the few occupants in a mellow mood, just perfect for the evening. The old man had dozed off to it. This left Booby and Sress in relative privacy to chat.

    “If that was the last of it, how are you going to pay the loan man when he comes in two weeks?” Bobby asked his voice full of concern for his friend.

    “A guard at the Gates of Qeynos is offering a couple of coppers to take care of some pests in the central farmlands. I’m going to head out there tomorrow, see what I can do,” Sress answered.

    “Long way to go for a man with no horse, why don’t you just stay here and kill the bugs we have out on the ranch, I can pay you double what the guard is.”

    Sress shook his head. “No, I promised Dad that I wouldn’t mooch off the locals, even if it does mean losing the house.”

    Bobby fished the last drop of beer from his mug, and then stood up to leave. “Considering all the crap you’ve been through I think the old man would be proud of you. There’s no shame in asking for help. If you don’t make enough in two weeks, come help us out. Promise? “

    Bobby left but Sress didn’t answer him. He sat slouched, sipping on what he considered to be his last beer.

    Crap…

    A sudden impulse came over his body. He jumped up from the table and ran after Bobby. He caught up to him in front of the inn.”

    Sress waited a few seconds before speaking, to catch his breath “What did you mean by proud?”

    Bobby frowned. “I meant that a lesser man would have given up and become a beggar by now.

    If that was a complement, Sress didn’t feel it. No, in fact he felt a tinge of rage instead. He let it fade, Bobby was a friend, hitting him would only make his situation worse and he was also fairly sure that Bobby could beat him.

    “You will come with us, won’t you?”

    “Yeah, I guess so. First let me do this job for the guard. Who knows, I might find something valuable along the way. ”

    The two men shook in agreement and started home.

    Sress was not much of a spiritual man but that night as he lay in his bed he prayed to the Gods for help, and for food.
  2. ARCHIVED-Mythra-Flux Guest

    Chapter#2 Night Time Activites
    ***
    The trip to Qeynos had been rewarding. Sress completed his job for the guard at the gates and got paid enough coppers to eat at the tavern for at least four weeks. But, having to resort to killing rats, snakes, and creepy-crawlies in order to eat, made him feel like an idiot.
    It was late in the day when he finished up, not enough time to make it back to Windstalker before night. He decided to walk as far as he could then camp in the woods or hills.
    The sun dipped below the horizon just as he made it to Archers Woods. The sky turned a brilliant pink color that seemed to stretch on forever.
    In the relative safety of the woods, Sress build a small fire and tired to settle down for the night.
    He kept his short tin sword clutched tight to his chest as he lay on his bed roll trying to sleep, but that didn’t come easy. Anxiety in his head wouldn’t let him relax, he was like a tightly wound spool of energy. Some people found the sound of the woods relaxing, Stress tried to focus his attention on the sounds around him. It was then he discovered that some of the sounds in the woods were not coming from the woods themselves.
    Unsheathing his sword, Sress went still, trying to locate the noise he was hearing. It sounded like voices, male voices.
    Highwaymen?
    Afraid to stay in one place, Sress got up from his bed roll and crept deeper into the woods
    Before he could sneak far enough away, he heard another voice that he hadn’t noticed before, the voice of woman.
    Curious, he moved back to his bed roll and sat down to listen, never once taking his hand of his sword
    “You little tease, you brought us all the way out here, you’d better be ready to have some fun.”
    “Oh, its just that I’m a little embarrassed, I’ve never done this before.”
    “Don’t worry sweetly, we’ll be gentle. I hope you’re ready.”
    “Of course I am, but do you have any money for me?”
    “Sure thing baby, we just stole a whole bunch of coins from a band on their way to Freeport.”
    “Well okay here I go; I’m taking it off now.”
    The next thing Sress heard was a series of gags, screams, groans, and bones breaking
    He leapt off the forest floor and ran in the direction he heard them, his fear forgotten.
    What greeted him there was the site of five men lying completely knocked out and striped with their underwear on their heads.
    He fled back to his bed roll. No way was he staying in the woods tonight.