Playerbase needs to learn what "laid-back" means

I know I am going to get hate for this thread. But I will make it anyways.

I've been back a couple months now. I've tried many servers, FV, Brekt, Xegony, Agnarr, Cornairv, Bristlebane, Antonius, and so forth. And one thing I have noticed is how vulgar and degrading people are. Guilds advertise they're laid back and then clarify they mean they are NSFW. Jokes are always sexual in nature and constant. And don't you even mention that this isn't a great thing, as they will attack you, violently. Calling all sorts of insults and reminding you this is the internet.

Yes, the internet brings out the truest personality of many people. But are you really bragging that the truest you is the trash of society? This is especially shocking, because at 30 years old, I'm still a "younger" player on Everquest vs other games. So you would think an older player base would have more respect and dignity.

Alas, that's not the case. Laid back doesn't mean what it does in other games. Where you don't have level/gear requirements. That raids aren't mandatory. That dying happens, so no sweat. No, laid back here means you're going to be bombarded by the worst humanity has to offer. And when you suggest to people that they would do better to carry themselves better, they will started posting insults to you in general chat and get a dozen more in server joining in.

It's a sad state when many of you have kids, even grandkids, and you revel in the fact that you are creating an atmosphere that is unsafe for their mental well-being. You scare away those struggling with mental disorders, trying to find peace in something they once knew and loved as a child. Players huddle to themselves, afraid of meeting new players because of experiences and public humiliation for simply asking for basic respect. You have made Everquest go from the pinnacle of classic music that inspired entire cultures, to the worst of hardcore ghetto rap that defiles music as a whole.

Everquest's community could do a lot better. But it's the internet. So likely this whole idea will be mocked and ridiculed. Almost taken as a challenge to be more disgusting in their online presence.

Anyways, rant over. I likely won't be reading replies, because I know the kind of comments, posts like this get. Yes, you have the right to act however you want online. I just truly pity you, if this is the character you desire to be as a person.

This part is the only bit that raised my eyebrows. I highly doubt you'll get much of that sort here.

But anyway, look for a "family friendly" guild instead of "laid back".

Laid back is purely in reference to playstyle, You're clearly looking for a Family Oriented/Family Friendly Guild as Outlander has explained, of which there are many

Not really sure what you're expecting. There are family guilds, with rules to keep guild chat PG/PG13. Other guilds are quite upfront that guild chat is NOT PG13... it's like going to a movie, seeing that rating and complaining afterwards that it had content you didn't like.

Can I has yer stuffs?

The misconception is the often toted belief that EverQuest has/had some magical community that is somehow different than that of “insert other game of choice”. It doesn’t, we have good people and bad people, and everyone I between, it’s always been this way. A time before general chat existed made strange run ins less common but OOC was still there.

Look for a family guild of like minded players and turn off general chat. It’s the best you can do.

And that's where you went wrong. If it's obvious that guild(s) isn't the place for you, just leave quietly, and look elsewhere. You can't show up at somebody else's party, and then tell them they're all doing it wrong. That's gonna get the same reaction, on the internet or not.

Not sure if you've been on a college campus recently, but political correctness and "safe spaces" are everywhere...

Anyone want to take a ten a 10 copper bet that he is sitting there hitting F5, F5, F5...refreshing that bad boy as fast as he can click to view replies to this?

I think you may have the wrong idea of laid back. I take that as they dont give a _ _ _ _.

True narcissism is demanding others change to meet your needs and demands. OP, if you dislike someone /block them and avoid them. Demanding conformity of thought and actions is fascist.

I'm surprised you had so many issues. EQ has such an older community and they've been extremely friendly from what I've seen on Bristlebane. Most importantly people in EQ genuinely love EQ, so they're having fun.

I don't know you and don't want to be mean in a thread about being nice, but:

There's a laidback guild that I am a part of on Emarr, the language in guild is usually pretty clean too. level 80 somethings often group with 110's even though they're not much help. You can pm me if you want some information.

Now for the "hate", laidback is a relative term. Laidback raid guilds are still going to be raid guilds with a goal and players in those guilds still have to perform. If you cause a wipe in a raid guild from failing emotes or something similar then you're wasting the time of the other 40-53 people who are paying attention. A guild that doesn't require you to have a fully maxxed out character that only raids 2 nights a week might be laid back in comparison to a different guild that raids 3-4 nights a week and requires a 70% attendance.

I'm not sure if you're looking to raid or just group. If you're ok with just grouping there are tons of laid back guilds but again with the above if it took your group 45 minutes to set up, get into position and you just wipe the group because you're not paying attention they might not want to group with you anymore.

Come to Tunare almost any night of the week and look at general chat. We are blessed with one of the most vile and disgusting excuses for a human being imaginable. He spews out every vile thing imaginable and gets a pass because he has the entire server convinced he's disabled and in a wheelchair. It's almost like living in the Frank Grimes episode of The Simpsons.

I mean no offense but the OP is definitely coming across as NOT laid back by anyone's definition. He needs to look for "family friendly" as has been suggested by others in this thread

Wow, guess I've been oblivious, haven't noticed this at all. Or, perhaps he's one of the handful I've /ignored over the years.

This person was in general on xegony spamming about this crap the other night and cares so little they also created a thread... ya ok

Signs that you're not very laid back.
1. Ranting on an internet forum.
2. Judging and criticizing everyone around you and not finding anyone up to your own ideal standards.
3. Putting down an entire community based solely on personal experience.

Maybe you should do a little more investigating before you join a guild. Some of us have very stressful jobs, some of us have to act "proper" all day, some of us are rather mature and respectful 99% of the time. When its time to unwind some of us just want to kick back, relax, and not worry about that 99% and let that 1% come out. It doesn't mean we are trash, bad people, unintelligent or what ever other conclusions you have come to. Its like one of those rare guys nights out when you are married and have kids. You go months acting like a mature, responsible, and respectful adult but when you get together with the guys you know you can just act like a kid again for a couple of hours and enjoy yourself without having to think about things. As already stated not all guilds are this way but many are. There is nothing wrong with these types of guilds unless you are someone who does not believe anyone should ever be able to be in the 1% ever. In this case just scoot scoot out the door and find something that is a better fit for your personality. There is no reason to come on here ranting about personality conflicts you have experienced.

Also when someone says "I have had bad experiences everywhere I go" it raises some red flags about the individual. Sure someone can have a good run of bad luck but odds are the problem is not with everyone else but with the person making the complaint. Its for this very reason its almost always a serious flaw to bash your previous employers on a job interview. A respective employer is going to here this and assume you are the problem not the other way around which is the assumption I came to immediately after reading this post. You came to server A with unrealistic expectations, when those were not met you went to server B, and then C and then...… Yep pretty sure everyone that plays and have interacted with you are horrible people or maybe you are doing something that's triggering people?

My small family guild helps others out any time we get the chance. We are not a raiding guild, so we don't get the L33T loot, but we do have fun up and down the roster at various levels. People outside of the guild help us along at higher levels as well, so there is community.

Of course, this takes time and trust, and there are people we'd rather stay away from, but that is reality in any game open to the public. What you bring with you and how you handle yourself are as important as what you are seeking. I hope you continue to look around and find what you are looking for and find a guild you are comfortable with.