Things That Must Be True in PlanetSide 2

Those things that have never been officially confirmed, but from bitter personal experience are clearly true*. Covers game mechanics, the enemy, your allies...you get the idea. The "unofficial rules" of life on Auraxis.

I'll start.

1. The enemy has air superiority.
2. Friendly air is a myth perpetrated by people misidentifying hostile air.
3. Behind every corner is a group of 5 enemies, all of whom are aware of your presence.
4. Killstreaks are things that happen to other people.
5. All Scythes come pre-fitted with flares. Except yours.
6. Regardless of server, continent or faction, your side is losing.
7. Flashes are actually prototype wheels for the next NS vehicle. They've almost got them to roll consistently.
8. Terrain is hostile AA in disguise.
9. The only effect of stealth upgrades and camouflage is that the enemy will give you a few extra seconds of pretending not to know you're there, out of respect for the effort you went to.
10. There's always another 100 certs to go before the upgrade.

What are your "rules"?

11. Your galaxy pilot's waypoint is always out of bounds behind the warpgate.

Rule F0rum51d3: If it exists, there is a whine thread about it.

12. Never lay mines by an enemy Sunderer when your outfit mate is standing fifty meters out with a rocket launcher.

Your AP mines are always the ones the enemy spots before triggering, and casually destroys, while the enemy's are all beneath terrain, yet still lethal.

Rule 13: The chance of a given teammate realizing that you're diffusing the tank mine he's about to shoot are about 5%.

The Terminals are already destroyed before you get there to hack them.

Rule 14: Even if you can't see them, they can still hurt you.

Rule 15: All buffs and nerfs must be ratified by Stew360 or he'll #@$£& and moan on the forums for at least a week.
Rule 15a: By extension, all Forumside posts must be ratified by Stew360, or they are by definition false.

15. A. Pull an A2A ESF, their will be no air, no flak, no lock ons but a sh#$ ton of ground targets.
15. B. Pull an A2G ESF, their will be sh%^ tons of air, flak, lock ons and few ground targets.
15. C. You will never have the right load out.
16.Fourmside. scattered thoughts lead to lots of edits..

Claymores.....


16. Pull any counter to specific targets and specific targets will suddenly disappear once you've pulled it.

You can never beat a heavy assault if you use a weapon that has only 30 bullets.
Your pump action shotgun never kills in one hit.
Enemies always turn a capture point and outnumber you when there are 10 seconds or less left.
When you destroy a sunderer and somehow there are even more enemies.
Your gunner always shoots enemy vehicles when your vehicle has anti infantry weapon.
Your max never get's revived even if you die in your own spawn room.

The other side is ALWAYS OP .. Unless you are winning, then feel free to trash talk in /yell about how weak they are.

You will always run out of rockets as the tank limps away on fire.

Miss one Max .. Don't worry another dozen will be along in a minute ( Mostly VS )

It's safer from getting run over by a friendlys if you run on the road rather than off it.

Friendlies are easier to roadkill than enemies.

Strikers law:

Strikers are totally OP and every single TR soldier has one and it's totally impossible to get any sort of enemy vehicle within 500m of a single TR HA trooper... Unless you're a TR flying an aircraft and getting badly ganged by a swarm of hostile ESF's, in which case you dodge, evade and kite them back over TR airspace while screaming for lock on G2A support but NO ONE has a Striker and you get blown out of the sky while the 75 HA troopers underneath you just stand there and watch.

Believe it or not, all allied players are NPCs that fire wildly in random directions hitting nothing. They're mostly there just for flair. You have to kill everything yourself.

There is nothing "Friendly" about an allied player. They are bastards and will kill you twelve times over as soon as you let your guard down.

Don't forget to use your jetpacks when crossing a road used by your faction's main vehicle force.

If you pull a SkyGuard, you'll go an hour without seeing any enemy aircraft

There's an proximity mine in every doorway.
Pull a MAX with kinetic armor, no one ever repairs you.
Whenever you're not near the cap point yourself, you side will lose it.
Your grenades never kill anything, enemy grenades always land right at your feet.
You're a footsoldier? Every sunderer is an ammo sundy. You're in a tank? Every sunderer is a blockade sundy.
Every single phalanx in your base got hacked, especially when you need them most.
If they're not hacked, nobody uses them anyway.
Enemy phalanx are always is pristine condition, and manned.
You never manage to run over anyone with your vehicles.
Every enemy vehicle that touches you kills you instantly.

The enemy can obliterate with some loadout (Common pool). As soon as you pull the exact same loadout, you die instantaneously.